Wednesday, 11 June 2008

• Thoughts on marriage...

  (I posted this on my regular xanga blog, but thought it might be worth posting here too.)

  This has been the progress of my thoughts on marriage over the years:

  As a child:

  Prince charming! True wuv! Happily ever after!
  La dee da dee da!

  As a teenager:

  I want to marry my boyfriend! OMG we are so totally soulmates!  Yes, I'm 16 yrs old... so what?

  As a college student:

  I'm going to be married by 24 at the LATEST.  I want the fancy dress, big wedding, blindingly huge diamond, perfect house, yuppie husband, and kids - all ASAP.

  As a 24 yr old:

  Holy crap! How did I think I'd be married by this age?  What the hell was I thinking?!

  As a 26 yr old:

  Why are all my friends getting engaged?  I hate being single.  No, I hate being the only single girl I know.

  As a 27 yr old with married friends:

  Marriage looks frakking insanely difficult.  I think I like being single now.

  Now:

  Marriage still looks insanely difficult, but I'm starting to understand how a marriage relationship should ideally reflect a relationship with God.  Woah.  That is heavy... but... I want it.  Not for the picturesque life, the 2.5 kids and the dog (ok, maybe the dog), or the diamond ring, or being a "Mrs. Somebody", but I finally want to experience that level of intimacy and vulnerability.  I want to be closer to God.

  <gulp>

   

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